Make me Smile (3)

  • The problem with cuddling in bed with your true love is that Smart Phones don’t cuddle back.
  • If you still pay for DVDs I have a Typewriter and a VCR I want to sell you.
  • If someone asks what you’re doing today, grab a knife & yell “SOMETHING I SHOULD’VE DONE A LONG TIME AGO!” Sounds way cooler than “Napping!”
  • If she’s naming your wedding album on facebook “wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!” she’s too young for you bro.
  • I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.
  • Don’t necessarily nominate me for sainthood, but today I gave a VERY ugly woman directions.
  • I hate it when I pee in my pants and people think its just water that splashed on my crotch from washing my hands.
  • Modern day camping is an uncharged phone.
  • “I have something I’d like to get off my chest.” – Guy with three nipples
  • Shot through the heart and you’re to blame. You give archers who shoot apples off of people’s heads a bad name. #bonJovi

About janbein

Gamer research Biologist who loves art, space and sports.

Posted on October 22, 2011, in freedom of speech, Funny, make me smile, Sarcasm and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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