Did You Know?

Did You Know?

You can flip a toaster on its side and grill cheese in it. Reynolds Wrap has lock in taps to hold the roll in place The color on the bread tab indicates how fresh the bread is And those colors are in alphabetical order: b, g, r, w, y. You can divide and store ground meat in a zip loc bag. Just break off how much you need and keep the rest in the freezer for later. If you place a wooden spoon over a pot of boiling water, it won’t boil over. Marshmallows can cure a soar throat. Perfect for kids who don’t like medicine. Stuffing a dryer sheet in your back pocket will repel mosquitoes. You can freeze cupcake batter for later use. You can paint upholstery You can make your own laundry soap. . You can dye plastic buttons. You can run a paper bag through your printer. You can print directly onto fabric. A dry erase marker can be used on most desk tops. You can mail anything that will take a stamp and weighs less than 13ounces without a box? If you break your blender jar you can replace it with a mason jar. Cereal canisters make the perfect trashcan for your car. Medicine cabinets are NOT the safest place for medicine Take your bananas apart when you get home from the store.If you leave them connected at the stem, they ripen faster.. Store your opened chunks of cheese in aluminum foil.It will stay fresh much longer and not mold! (but you can scrape off any mold and still eat the cheese without changes in flavor! Peppers with 3 bumps on the bottom are sweeter and better for eating.Peppers with 4 bumps on the bottom are firmer and stronger flavored. Add a teaspoon of water when frying ground beef.It will help pull the grease away from the meat while cooking.

Conceived in my heart

 

 

 
I have for the first time found what I can truly love – I have found you. You are my sympathy–my better self–my good angel–I am bound to you with a strong attachment. I think you are good, gifted, lovely: a fervent, a solemn passion is conceived in my heart; it leans to you, draws you to my center and spring of life, wraps my existence about you–and, kindling in pure, powerful flame, fuses you and me in one.

Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre

 

 

The Velveteen Rabbit

 

“Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse. “It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.” “Does it hurt?” asked the Rabbit. “Sometimes,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. “When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.” “Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,” he asked, “or bit by bit?” “It doesn’t happen all at once,” said the Skin Horse. “You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”

The Velveteen Rabbit

I think the life cycle is all backwards

 

 

The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What’s that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you’re too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating…

 

…and you finish off as an orgasm.

– George Carlin